Last month when I was in New York John drove to Bastrop to meet our sons and their families. He called me, "I'm in Texas holding Gwyneth and Adalyn!"
"I'm in New York holding Florence." I said.
"You are the gold star grandmother and I am the silver star grandfather," he said.
"How can that be?" I questioned, "You're holding two sweet grandaughters and I have one."
"You are the gold star grandmother. . . because I miss you."
Always good to be home-

when it's hard. . .

And let the wife see to it that she respects her husband.
"Do you think this is such a struggle for all wives?" a woman asked me recently.
Well, yes-a struggle for all wives, because to obey God is to go against our nature.
But, no-not such a struggle, for some the struggle is less arduous, for others more, and frankly, some husbands are more difficult to respect (and some wives more difficult to love!)

Perhaps you are that wife in a particularly difficult situation; perhaps it seems asthough your husband is actively working against your efforts to obey God's command.
It's hard. . . looking through a biblical lense then, I know this is true:
1) God's command in Ephesians 5: 33 is true for all wives, without exception. And God is on the throne, his sovereignty rules over all. God doesn't get off the throne, stop ruling, when life is hard-so I remind myself. A firm reliance on God's sovereignty will help you and me to obey God.
2) Focus on God's glory. While pleasing God must always be my motive, a wife's conduct can impact her husband.
"Wives be subject to your own husbands so that even if some do not obey the Word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives when they see your respectful and pure conduct." (1 Pet 3:1-2)
What an amazing passage-God says here that a wife's respectful conduct has influence. It doesn't mean that she never says a word; we're told in other parts of Scripture to speak the truth in love, to be ready to give an answer for the hope that is within us, and a biblical reproof may be the most loving response to a husband who is sinning. However, this wife doesn't preach at her husband-she speaks fewer words and her respectful behavior is a powerful influence in her husband's life.
3) Trust God. . . Ah, yes, trust God. Scripture tells us how the holy women of old trusted God. Sarah respected her husband, calling him Lord; she hoped in God not being frightened by any fearful thing (1 Pet 3:5-6). That example is for you and me.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. . .we can do that, even when it's hard, because of Jesus-
because we know that Jesus is the author and perfecter of faith. . . (Heb 12:2)
Aye, sorry so long-enough for now, but there's more. . .

orange things. . .

On Wednesday, Luke and Gabrielle returned from their trip and we returned their children. For an entire week two sets of grandparents divided the grandchildren, half-n-half. . .
Saturday at our house we read Molly's Pilgrim (Barbara Cohen) and talked about it; then we ate orange things-baby carrots, cheddar cheese cubes, gumey pumpkins, tart and sweet pumpkin candies, orange juice. The next day we made pumpkin muffins with cream cheese frosting. We ate them- and drank Pumpkin Pie Soda. I couldn't resist, the label and packaging were amazing (surpassing the taste.)
What's a grandmother to do?
And the thoughtful parents brought gifts for the grandmothers, blue for Martha, orange for me; I can't wait to fill it with salsa or guacamole-and I can't wait for the next time (now that I've cleaned up and rested a bit). . .the grandchildren come to stay.

thinking biblically about respect-a command

A few weeks ago I wrote some thoughts about thinking biblically and about focus-about where I choose to focus the lense of my mind. I was preparing for a teaching opportunity. . .Thinking Biblically- Respecting Your Husband. So, I prepared it-and last Thursday I taught it. . .
Respect: to be in awe of, to honor, to treat as someone special, to esteem, to admire, to pay proper attention to (not ignore!), to show consideration for, to treat courteously, to heed (to listen to).

Ahh, a worthy pursuit, a huge topic, and no, I don't have it all figured out- but truth challenges my heart.
So, first the command: ". . .and let the wife see to it that she respects her husband."(Ephesians 5:33). Sometimes I chafe, imagining that God's commands just dangle, unattached. . . Soul, remember His character- our God is holy, not harsh-loving, not capricious nor fickle; every command He gives is meant for my good and assuredly, He gives the means and grace to obey. When I'm tempted to doubt God's goodness in this command, I remember. . ."He Himself bore our sins in his body on the cross that we might die to sin and live to righteousness." (1 Peter 2:24)
The wise will give heed. . .consider the loving kindness of the Lord (Ps 107:43)
God's command in Ephesians 5:33 is addressed to wives-all wives, without exception.
Wives are commanded to see to it that they respect-the command is worded in such a way as to lay the responsibility squarely on the wife's shoulders. (Have you ever noticed that as wives we see to it that alot gets done-errands, bills, meals, car pool, coffee, laundry, knitting, reading. . .?)
In Ephesians 5:33 respect is a verb, something we do or show. We know that out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks- so, respect begins in our hearts and is displayed in our words, attitudes, actions. . .toward our husbands.
"I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of the wife is her husband. . ." (1 Cor 11:33)
It's about God, about His design; He has set the husband as head, and He calls the wife to honor that postion. I've been thinking about it, focusing my biblical lense. . .respect is to be rendered to my husband because God has required it, not because my husband has earned it. Respecting my husband is a decision I make to obey God's Word. It's really all about God-and me.
Enough for now. . .but there's more.

kitchen day

Ahh, Central New York has apples, so many kinds of lovely apples. . .and I have memories of our orange Fiat, full of windfall apples in Oregon and crates of apples in Zacatlan de las manzanas in Mexico-years and years ago.
So-it's nice to spend all day in the kitchen. . . well, not every day-but from time to time, especially when there are at least 2 cooks, each focused on her recipe; then over a coffee good talk fills in the cracks.
Abi and I spent one entire day in the kitchen. . .we baked scones in the morning for tea guests, and in the afternoon she baked 3 loaves of bread while I cooked up 2 different soups- Abi's kitchen has just one pot large enough for soup. (we are resourceful women)
Then we took a break from the kitchen and delivered 1 soup and 2 breads to a friend who has a new baby; finally we sat down-and ate the other soup and bread.
But the pinnacle of our kitchen day was Apple Cinnamon Coffee Cake-here. it was so good, chunks of apple rolled into a cardamom yeast dough.
So, if you like apple and sweet bread. . . carry on!

a carpet and a quote. . .

The leaves make a carpet. . .and one day over lunch, we purused quotes by G..K. Chesterton--here's a favorite . .

Feminism is mixed up with a muddled idea that women are free
when they serve their empl0yers but slaves when they help their husbands.

one about focus. . .

brown eyes, blue eyes

I'm trying to become a better photographer. . . Florence and her sweet Mama make a lovely subject, don't you think? So, I'm practicing with aperture and shutter speed, attempting to figure out lighting and focus-I'm working at it.

And I'm studying for a teaching opportunity at the end of the month. Think biblically, I scribbled at the top of my page. Biblical thinking is a lot like focus with my camera. Sometimes the wrong image is in focus, the bush rather than the boy- sometimes everything is out of focus- Blurry! I notice how my camera focuses on what appears to be the prominent image--but really, I need to tell it where to focus!
Likewise, by thinking biblically, I'm telling the lense of my mind where to focus. . .I choose to view my circumstances through the lense of the gospel, remembering that I've been redeemed wtih the precious blood of Christ, He loved me and delivered himself up for me!
And I view my life through the lense of eternity-set your mind on the things above where Christ is. . .and through the lense of truth, God's Word-for the grass withers and the flowers fade, but the Word of God endures forever-

Hmm. . .so we'll see where this takes me--with my camera, with the teaching topic at hand-and in my life, amid it all. . .where I chose to focus the lense of my mind.

We make it our ambition, whether at home or absent, to be pleasing to the Lord (2 cor 5:9)